GLOGtober Day 3: Goblinism, A Study

 Of all the diseases of the infinite multiverse, the most insidious are those that are self-inflicted. And while Narcissus Syndrome and The Mirror Plague are indeed terrifying, we managed to stop those eventually. The same cannot be said for goblinism, the greatest threat we face in this universe, that turns our people into low-power monsters for low-power adventurers to kill. Many have theorised that it is the universe’s way of keeping up supply for the constant demand that the everyday influx of new adventurers inevitably brings. And so, presented here are my rather incomplete notes on the subject.

Goblinism

Contraction: A person contracts goblinism by one of two means: feeling pity for the plight of goblins, or using weak and cowardly tactics to kill people of far less power than you for too long.

Onset: The first symptoms of goblinism appear as an impulse to set up devious traps around your house. You do not consider this strange, but if it is pointed out by someone else you may be able to stop the disease early by killing a goblin in an honourable duel. You progress to the first stage after someone gets caught in one of your traps.

Stage 1: Your skin becomes a pallid green colour as you begin to hunch over constantly, as if a massive weight was upon your back. During otherwise serious social situations, you must save vs. instinct or play a prank on the person who would have the worst reaction to it. You progress to stage two after getting caught from a prank. You may still reverse your transformation if you find and appeal to the current goblin king to release you from your duty.

Stage 2: Your height is halved, and your skin turns into fireproof scales. All of your stats except Dexterity are reduced by 2, and your Intelligence is reduced by a further 4. Your dexterity increases by 4. You have an overwhelming urge to go out into the world, find an area that new adventurers are likely to go to, and attempt to kill them. Your movement speed and stealth are increased by 50%. You may still reverse your transformation if you find and appeal to the current goblin king to release you from your duty. You progress to stage three after killing or dying to your first adventurer.

Stage 3: Your transformation becomes irreversible, and you become a true goblin. Your ears are now pointy, and your teeth become shark-like. You gain the ability to throw a small fireball that deals 1d6 fire damage on a hit. You lose the ability to communicate in anything except goblin.